Tuesday, August 21, 2007

Still in love...


As much as I am hating my body at the moment, I am still loving my locks! One week away from my five month anniversary!

12 comments:

Mel said...

And so you should; they're looking great!

Meikmeika said...

Your locks look good!!! Love the lipstick!!!

For some reason the more we accept our bodies the easier we lose weight, atleast for me, but it's so dern hard to accept something you don't like or you're not happy with...sigh...

Before you know it you will have lost the weight and have ran a marathon!

blackrussian said...

Thanks Mel!

And thank you MM. You are not the first person to tell me that...Not that I WANT to be unhappy, but I DO feel like I need a certain amount of discontent NOW at the beginning to motivate me.

I would never accept this new and unwelcome change, but I could see myself settling into complacency and feelings of helplessness.

However, if I remind myself how UNHAPPY I am and how INCONVENIENT this is, then I will HAVE to do something about it immediately.

Funny you should mention the lipstick. I literally have 2 tubes of lipstick and no more. It's the same color I'm wearing in all my pics, but I think it looks different with the green shirt. I normally wear earth tones.

I'd thought to myself: I like the way my lipstick looks with that shirt, but I didn't think anyone else would notice.

Seriously, though, my SLs have been the BEST thing for my self-esteem. No matter how unhappy I am with anything else about my appearance, I'm always like: Yeah, But my LOCKS ROCK! They are AWESOME!

And momentarily all is well...

n'Drea said...

Awww, c'mon now. No self-hate now. Been there, done that. It's wasted, negative energy, and I've been seeing you as the positive type. I think you look GREAT, and I'm not just saying that. If you want to lose a few pounds, fine, but please, pleeeeaaassse in the name of everything sacred, DON'T become a Twiggy. Black women happen to be genetically blessed with the 2 Bs - breasts and butts. We can't help it if we're buxom. (Actually, I'm only blessed with 1 B, but hey, I'm still giving thanks, lol).

I'll be rooting for you as you strive to reach your goal, but I don't want to hear another word about you hating ANY part of yourself. Yu 'ear mi?

An' yu locks dem lookin' good.

blackrussian said...

Thanks n'drea,

I only got 1 B too! I know white girls with more junk than I got...it's a running joke among my friends.

I'll never be twiggy, that isn't even my goal! I like being soft and round and womanly...really I do, but right now I am TOO soft and TOO round.

And the B I got...let's just say I'm feeling less like a pinup and more like a wet nurse or 'mammy'...small frame, big boobs, bad combo. I won't post pics that tell the story....this ain't that kinda website. You'll just have to take my word!

My vanity won't let me post the truly tubby full-body shots until I have nice 'after' pictures to go beside them.

And I AM a positive person. You're right. I'm almost endlessly optimistic, but right now I am REALLY frustrated with myself over all of the bad habits I've fallen into. And I'm just really upset over my lack of self-discipline lately.

You know how you 'kick yourself' when you make a bad decision and you KNEW better? You're just like: OOH! What did I do THAT for?

It's that kind of 'hating' as opposed to deep self-loathing.

But, hey girl, thanks for the LOVE! I'm soaking all of it up!

n'Drea said...

Gotta show the love, girl. And I understand now. I'm in your corner :)

ja stu sister lock journey said...

Your hair looks absolutely great, I am in my 5th month and really loving my locks more each day, I read your blogs very often,find them quite informative.

blackrussian said...

Hi, thanks for posting a comment on my blog. I always like to know who is reading. You're in my blog roll, so I stop by every time you post a new entry!

And thank you so much for the compliment...I can't believe how MUCH I love my locks! I hoped I would like them as well as twists, and was afraid I would not like them as well as I liked my loose hair, but I love them so much more!

I was afraid of the changes and the unknown, but now that I have actually started the process, I find myself continually fascinated by the look and feel of my 'new' hair!

ja stu sister lock journey said...

THE UP-TO-DATE PHOTOS ARE AT MY JASISTAH BLOG I THINK I HAVE TOO MANY BLOG NAMES, HOPE TO TRY AND SORT THAT OUT SOON.

Aya said...

5 months already? How time flies when you're having fun. I am so jealous (not literally) of the long locks in the front. That has always been my problem area. Your locs are really coming together nicely. Be proud!!!!

roxy said...

this is a really great picture of you. and i'm loving your locs!! :)

blackrussian said...

Thanks for the compliments Aya and Roxy.